My Secret is Out...

 The preverbal cat has been sprung from the bag.... Yes it's true…. I've been outed!!!!!!!!!

Yes I am (pause to add drama) ……

"The Red Power Ranger".

Yes I've kept a good job of hiding it from all of you, but come on now I'm really surprised that it took you all this long to figure it out.

First: Have you ever seen The Red Power Range and myself at the same time?

Secondly: All those trips I take on short notice to far away places and come back not knowing anything about the place. The front of "I partied so hard, I don't really remember what happened" ... Now come on people what kind of a lush do you think I am?!?!?!?! All I can say is thank god for Photoshop so that I could add my picture in front of all those tourist spots.  

Yes on all those trips I have been spanning the globe... (pause again for impact).... "Fighting evil".

Now I guess, I can get a few things off my chest.....

 Fighting evil is a thankless job, sure people love to see you when your cleaned up, but then I have to run off and fight crime. 

Where the hell are they when your muscles are sore and you can't quite reach a spot to apply lotion??? Come on people Spandex chafes!!!

Kids love me too…. 

But there’s always the one who mocks me in the picture….

 …and there’s always the one who calls me out for a fight, and being the good superhero, I have to pretend fight and let the kid win….

One of these day’s I’d just like to beat the snot out of one of these kids……

And now that you all know about the Red Power Mobile (RPM for us in the know) don't be expecting to borrow it, it's still for official business use only....

Sorry, tax purposes... the IRS has been all over the Power Rangers ass!!! You’d think after all the times I saved this country nay the world, the government would call off those IRS goons. 

And why is it after a long day of fighting crime and I want to go out and just let loose, I have to wait in line at the club, while these poser wannabe rock star dot com guys get to walk right up????? Ooohhh Like their so cool, where were they when I was out fighting evil?????  

So yes, it seems like it's allot of venting right now, but I've been keeping up this charade for quite some time and frankly I'm sick of it!!!!

I think I'm officially hanging up my Red helmet don't worry, I'll still be available to save an occasional damsel in distress (Especially the cute ones) and of course there's always going to be some crime fighting.... and don't forget the Parades... Cause as you know “I’m only  human” and I do love a good parade.

Oh well I guess I'll see you around....